Saturday, May 28, 2011

COOL


I'm not beautiful.
I'm cool with that.
I'm not skinny.
I'm cool with that.
I'm not tall.
I'm cool with that.
Not everyone supports my dreams.
I'm cool with that.
Not everyone shares my vision.
I'm cool with that.
I'm about to kick down the door of success and walk in like I own the place.
I'm cool with that.
I'm gonna leave the haters and naysayers behind.
Are YOU cool with that?
~ruthsbaby

THIS IS WHY I MUST SET YOU FREE...TO BE

Sometimes I sit and stare at you
I know you're a good man and perfect for me
No matter how hard I try I cannot get you to open your eyes
To see that I am perfect for you
Tonight as you sleep
I gently touch your face
Amazed at what a beautiful man you are inside and out
Tears fill my eyes and threaten to spill
Because you will never be mine
In this quietness I hear your heart beat out a rhythm
My heart responds
You'll never know because you won't allow yourself to love me
I have tried to erase that pain inflicted by another
Only to succeed in hurting myself
My tears spill in sorrow for what will never be
I will never hold our child with your brown eyes
I will never hold and protect you through the storm
I will never grow old with you
The rhythm of my heart will continue to beat alone
Tonight as you sleep I say my final goodbye
Finally I realize I must let you go so that
You are free
I am free
To be
~ruthsbaby

Thursday, May 26, 2011

WHO I AM

I am invisible
The hue of my skin is what you see
The size of my body is what is viewed
No matter how softly or loudly I speak I am not heard
Often underestimated and taken for granted and expected to accept this
Constantly expected to be the "good girl" and never make waves
The cheerleader but rarely cheered
The listener, the comforter, the nurturer
This is how I am seen
Yet unseen

I am vibrant and funny
I cry at commercials and sappy songs
I defend my family and friends like a lioness protects her cubs
I am intelligent and a visionary
I love with every fiber of my being
I am Proverbs 31 Woman
I am phenomenal
THIS IS WHO I AM

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

WRITES MOUNTAIN

Mmmmmm.....Writes Mountain
Sounds omnious
Have I been and what did I see
I've been invited but haven't taken the climb
I stand at the base gazing up with trepidation and awe
The climb must be made that I know
It's such an arduous journey
I must prepare my mind and body

Fear does not stop me
I wonder am I good enough
Can I honestly sit at the table at the top of the mountain with those I have come to admire
Do I have the words that will grant me access to a seat at the table
Will my words touch their hearts and minds

Words race through my mind
Questions crowd the corners of my brain
Stay at the base or climb
Climb or stay at the base
The base offers security
The climb offers uncertainty

Security is over rated
So I climb
I reach the top
Writes Mountain
I am greeted with love, support and inspiration
I am led to the writers table
I see my chair--comfy cozy and made for me
I sit in my chair
I open my journal and see a note
"WE ALL HAVE A DECISION OF STAY AT THE BASE OR CLIMB TO THE TOP....WELCOME HOME"
~ruthsbaby

Monday, May 16, 2011

SHINE

You can't stop my shine
      You can't stop my shine
You can't stop my shine

Negativity has surrounded me
Beating me down
Depleting my energy

Doubt has entered my mind
Immobilizing me
Diminishing my power

Words have wounded me
Causing my body to bleed
My life force seeping out

I have cried
Hidden myself from the world
Becoming invisible

I have swam in that sea of negativity
Gasping for breath
Aiming for the shore

I have slept in the bed of doubt
Tossing and turning
Seeking rest and peace

I have stood unshielded from the words
Body and spirit bruised
Wanting acceptance

Finally I had enough
I looked in the mirror
I saw myself
I accepted myself
Shining

You can't stop my shine
     You can't stop my shine
You can't stop my shine

~ruthsbaby